Nostalgia Critic: Top 11 Villain Songs

I love the Nostalgia Critic. I think he's incredibly funny and I visit his website, ThatGuyWithTheGlasses, all the time. That said, I thought his latest video, Top 11 Villain Songs, was very sloppy. A lot of the songs seemed like poor choices and some didn't even make sense being on the list. So I thought I'd go through the list and explain why I felt it was so poor.

To start with, I assumed that all the songs on the list would be dark and menacing songs sung by a villain. I also figured because of that criteria that there would be a lot of songs from older Disney animated movies, and this being the Nostalgia Critic, that that would work out fine. To recap, the rules as I saw them were:

1) The song must be dark and menacing.

2) It must be sung by a villain

3) It must be nostalgic (i.e. old)

According to the criteria, how well did the songs do? Very badly.

Already we've run into trouble and the list hasn't even begun yet. In the title card for the video we see five figures. Four of them star in villainous songs in the video, but the fifth one, Oogie Boogie, the one who's centered in the middle of the image and standing in front of the other figures is not featured. Why would you put him there if you didn't intend for him to be in the video? Moving on...

11) "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" from How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Problems again. The song is not sung by the villain, it's sung by a narrator. Okay, fine. But then the song is also whimsical, about Christmas, and in a children's cartoon. We're not starting out very dark or menacing. However, the song is catchy and well sung, so I'll let it pass.

10) "Shiver My Timbers" from Muppet Treasure Island

Again, wtf? The song is sung by a chorus of random unnamed pirates and goofy muppet creatures. There is no established villain and the song is neither dark nor menacing. To make matters worse, Doug Walker admits to not even having seen the movie. C'mon dude, take an hour and a half out of your video making time and watch the movie. The fact that he hasn't seen the movie means some of the impact is lost and he can't comment/joke about any of the contextual things that happen around the song.

9) "Friends on the Other Side" from The Princess and the Frog

Three songs in the video gets good. The song is sung by a villain, it's dark, menacing, colorful, well made, and the villain's voice is very diabolical sounding. Just one problem: The song is from 2009! What the hell are you doing putting something from 2009 in a Nostalgia Critic video?

8) "Pretty Women" from Sweeny Todd

It's not dark or menacing in any way, it's just plain goofy. It's also really stupid.

7) "Sweet Transvestite" from The Rocky Horror Picture Show and "Dentist" from Little Shop of Horrors

The Nostalgia Critic puts both songs at this number because they're similar. Indeed, they're both similarly out-of-place. Both are over-the-top silly songs that have no place being on a best of list for villainous songs. Both don't feature a villain: Steve Martin's character is more of an asshole than anything else and Tim Curry's character doesn't seem at all villainous, although even if you conclude that he is the song itself isn't villainous either.

6) "In the Dark of the Night" from Anastasia

The song is awful. As the Nostalgia Critic himself points out, the villain isn't so much singing menacingly as he is "talking in rhyme with musical accompaniment" (a problem that will afflict additional movies on the list) and the "prancing pink bugs" don't help the already bad atmosphere. To top it off, the song sounds more like a religious choir song than a villain song.

5) "Poor Unfortunate Souls" from The Little Mermaid

I would say it was an all around well made villain song with catchy lyrics but, and this is the key to understanding why this song is bad, Ursula's voice is like getting ear-raped by the devil.

4) "He Had It Comin'" from Chicago

This is not a villain song. This is a song about villains, not sung by them. It's also silly and over-the-top. I just feel... fuck.

3) "Be Prepared" from The Lion King

The villain is not singing, he is, again, talking in rhyme with musical accompaniment.

2) "Secret of Survival" from Mr. Toad's Wild Ride

Goofy. Silly. Fail.

1) "Hellfire" from The Hunchback of Notre Dame

What I find ironic about the #1 song is that it's the worst song on the list. Not only is the villain talking (not singing) with musical accompaniment, he isn't even bothering to rhyme. The background music itself is the most bland orchestral/choir music you could possibly come up with.

I'm seriously shocked at how bad the video was. None of the songs worked. Hope the next video won't be a disappointment.